Sunday, 31 August 2008


It's 12.30 a.m.

It's Merdeka (Independence) Day.

I'm sitting in front of the computer,

in an apartment in Melbourne,


Most of my friends have gone clubbing. The rest have gone for "glam" dinners.

I .......................................

did my Chemistry project with Jia Yi.

Yes, I know I have no life.


A couple of my friends asked me to go clubbing. My parents said it was okay, as long as I be careful. I've never gone before, you see. In the end, I decided not to go.


1. For the past 17 years of living my life in Malaysia, I've never even celebrated Hari Merdeka. The most I've done is to stay up till 12 am, to watch the fireworks.

2. I'm still underage. I turn 18 this year, but I'm not legally 18 yet (birthday is in December).

3. I'd rather save the first time I go to a club for something more meaningful, like, say, my 18th birthday. Or something like that. Then it would be, you know, meaningful. Omg, clubbing virginity. Ahah. XD

Not to say that Merdeka isn't special, of course. I'm proud of my country, its been able to stand on its own feet for 51 years.. That's got to count for something.

Jalur Gemilang.

You know, I kind of like the "Jalur Gemilang" song. I find it quite catchy.

Merahmu bara semangat waja
Putihmu bersih budi pekerti
Kuning berdaulat payung negara
Biru perpaduan kami semua

Puncak dunia telah kau tawan
Lautan luas telah kau redah
Membawa semangat jiwa merdeka
Semarak jaya kami warganya

Empat belas melintang jalurnya
Semua negeri dalam Malaysia
Satu suara satu semangat
Itu sumpah warga berdaulat

Jalur gemilang... di bawah naunganmu
Jalur gemilang... kami semua bersatu
Perpaduan ketaatan
Amalan murni rakyat Malaysia
Jalur gemilang... megah kami terasa
Jalur gemilang... kibarkanlah wawasan
Merah putih biru kuning
Jalur semangat kami semua


Jalur gemilang

So, to all the Malaysians out there ..


Maybe it's something worth fighting for?

Saturday, 30 August 2008

Tagged by Yee Jeat.


1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog.

Starting time: 11.30 am
Name: Caitlin Kang Jia Qian
Sister: None
Brother: Gary Kang
Shoe size: Either 4 or 5
Height: 160 cm
Where do you live: At the moment, in Melbourne.
Favourite drinks: None in particular.
Favourite breakfast: None in particular.

Have you ever...

been on a plane : Yes.
swam in the ocean : The shore counts, right?
fallen asleep in school : More times than I can count. =P
broken someone's heart : I'm not entirely sure.
fell off your chair : I vaguely remember..
sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : Unfortunately, yes.
saved e-mails : A long time ago.

What is your room like?
Right now? Small. But comfortably so.
What's right beside you?
On my left, the TV. On my right, the mouse and my phone.
What is the last thing you ate?
Biscuits, I think.

Ever had...

chicken pox : Yes, when I was 2, if I'm not mistaken.
sore throat : Definitely.
got stitches : Yes.
broken nose : Almost, but no. That time when I fell flat on my face in the sand (field - think sand and rocks) in Standard 4, and my upper lip was like, covered with blood.. haha.

Do you...

believe in love at first sight?
I will if I see it.
Like picnics?
Picnics are fun.

Who was the last person...

you danced with?
My cousins, at Grandma's 81st back in Malaysia (June).
who made you smile?
Wei Khai. Who was talking about how he loves Avril Lavinge's cuteness. XP
you last yelled at?
Jason Woi. Drama la, have to act all drunk and mad. =P

Today did you...

talk to someone you like?
Not today, no.
kiss anyone?
get sick?
Yes. Running nose. =(
talk to an ex?
What an interesting coincidence. Yes, he emailed.
miss someone?
Not at the moment.
Best feeling in the world?
When you look back on your life and see everything you've achieved despite the mountains you had to climb.
Who do you really hate?
I'm trying not to hate. No one deserves to be hated.
What time is it now?
11.43 am.

Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now?
Q: Do you have any siblings?
Yes, a brother.
Q: Do you want children?
Q: Do you smile often?
I hope so.
Q: Do you like your hand-writing?
When it looks nice, yes.
Q: Are your toenails painted?
Q: Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in?
Now, wouldn't you like to know. *sly grin* XP
Q: What colour shirt are you wearing?
White and green. MSSD Petaling shirt.
Q: What were you doing at 7:00pm yesterday?
Doing the dishes after doing my laundry.
Q: When did you cry last?
A long time ago.
Q: Are you a friendly person?
I hope so. But apparently not always. =(
Q: Do you have any pets?
Back in Malaysia, a dog.
Q: Where is the person you have feelings for right now?
I don't want to know.
Q:Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now?
Does Carmen grabbing my hand last night to wake me up count? Of course, she means the world to me. Like I could say anything else (what if she chops my head off in my sleep? o.O). XD Kidding, Carmen, you know I love you. =)

Do you sleep with the TV on?
Not anymore.
What are you doing right now?
Why do all tags ask this question? I'm doing this tag.
Have you ever crawled through a window?
Can you handle the truth?
I'd like to say I can. But only sometimes.
Are you closer to your mother or father?
Equally so.
Who was the last person you cried in front of?
Mum, probably.
How many people can you say you've really loved?
I don't know.
Do you eat healthy?
Quite. (steamed food, man! Hee.)
Do you still have pictures of you and your ex?
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you?
Many times.
How often do you go to church?
I'm not a Christian.
When you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to?
Carmen. But only because it's convenient, since she's living with me. XD
Are you loud or quiet most of the time?
Depends on the company.
Are you confident?
I like to appear so.

5 things I was doing 10 years ago
When I was seven and a half...
-going to primary school
-learning ballet
-speaking mandarin =P
-learning mental arithmetics
-playing pretend, I suppose.

5 things on my to-do list today
-go to the gym
-finish my Environment & Development essay
-drama practice
-work on Chemistry presentation

5 snacks I enjoy:
-I like fruits. Fruits don't count, do they?
-COOKIE. Which is the same as biscuits, come to think of it.
-nothing much else.

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:
-help out with charities
-get a nice house in a nice area
-build my own ice-skating rink
-take my family on trips around the world
-make more money =)

5 of my bad habits:
-perhaps too emotional
-unsociable =(
-loud/sharp (with the things I say)

5 jobs I've had:
I've never had an official job.


Hwee Ling.
Yun Shen.

You set me on my feet, and now that I can walk again, it's time for me to move on, once more.

Friday, 29 August 2008

Fast-paced Society.

... because time waits for no man.

It's nearly the end of AUGUST.

Almost a year ago, I couldn't believe I was going to Trinity. I couldn't believe I was going to Australia. A year ago, all I was trying to do was to patch up my life, and get myself back on the right track.

I've been here for almost 7 months.

It doesn't seem like a very long time, when I put it down like that. But soon it'll be a year. Where did all those weeks go? Heck, where did all those MONTHS go?

Almost a year ago, I didn't think I'd be able to cook for myself, clean up after myself, find my own way around, do things by myself.

I've been doing it for almost 7 months.

So, to that statement I made so many times all those months ago ...


Don't look to the future; live life for what it is TODAY.

Thursday, 28 August 2008


... because it makes the world go round.

I played the piano today. At Swanston. For a bit more than an hour.

*contented smile*

I really need to start playing again. Grade 8 in piano and I still can't sight read well. =(

I found this cool website online.

It's really cool ! It's a virtual keyboard. Yes, I am deprived. I miss my piano.

I'm sleepy. I haven't been sleeping early. That's not good. Because if I don't sleep early I get cranky. Okay, I don't get cranky. I fall asleep in class. And falling asleep in class is not good. Because I get totally lost. Like for Chemistry! Haha. I've absolutely no idea what the lecturer is teaching now.

Oh, I can't believe it's the end of the week already. And the end of the month. And soon it'll be the end of the year. And soon ..... *gasp* so, so soon. Things are moving really, really fast.

One day, when you finally work up the courage to tell me how you feel, I'll be waking up next to the guy who dared a long time ago.

Tuesday, 26 August 2008

A Tribute to Cheng Chun.

... because he rocks. ;)


I miss youuuuuu !!!

I know you miss me !!!

Right right right?



How am I supposed to choose?

Monday, 25 August 2008

Padan Muka.

... because it's finally my turn to laugh.

Psychology lecture was canceled today!! =)

No idea why, I hope Ian is okay, after all that dancing at the Mixer. *smirk*

Oh, I slept late last night. Like, really late. Olympics closing ceremony la.. =P I think it was 1 am. Which is late for me. I know I'm weird. Shuddup. =)

The Olympics was amazing. I wish it lasted longer. China did an amazing job. Even though a lot of people thought they couldn't do it. The opening ceremony was amazing too. =)

China - 51 Golds
U.S. - 36 Golds
Russia - 23 Golds

Malaysia WILL win at least 1 gold medal .............. someday.

Lee Chong Wei still did an amazing job. A silver medal is still really, really good, right? =)

I'm bored. I'm overusing the word "amazing". I think I've heard it too many times from Carmen. She thinks she's amazing. Now I have to say I think she's amazing. Hehe. I'm talking nonsense. =)

Rose said we should extend the dateline for joining the Talent Quest till this Friday (29th August 2008). So yeah.

I should be catching up on my work. I need ............

CRAP I NEED TO READ GOGOL (The Overcoat) !!!

Sh*t, I forgot!! OMGOMGOMG. And I need to memorise those monologues.


Oh you know what? My group's drama performance was pretty okay. Considering we only practiced for the first time ... yesterday. Amazing. Lucky everyone in my group is quite good at impromptu-ing. XD

The real performance is next week, so I hope we don't screw that up. Hehe.

Okay, going to read Gogol before going to student committee meeting. =P

Stuck between the cross roads.

Sunday, 24 August 2008

Mixer Party!

... because people just want to have fun. =)

So today's (technically yesterday's - it's 12.30 am now) Trinity College Foundation Studies' Mixer Party was quite AWESOME!

There were quite a number of people, so I think it was a pretty good turnout... which is good! =)

Oh, you know, the furniture in the Dining Hall (where we had the Mixer Party)?

Those chairs (and tables) are FREAKISHLY HEAVY. The student committee members had to push all the tables and stack up the chairs on the tables before the event, and then had to put everything back after the event. It was .... tiring, to say the least. But I think Alastair probably did the most work with the pushing of tables and chairs, so yeah, thanks goes to him. =)
And everyone who helped out, of course. Most of the student committee members were superrrr helpful, with like, Suet Sim making drinks the whole night, Carmen standing by the door, Chu Pu and Michael going to get the pizza, Chin Joe getting people to buy stuff.. it was really good, everyone worked really hard to get everything right.

Thanks guys, for all the effort you put in. =)

But I think the kudos really goes to Sarah Woo, who more or less single handedly organised the event. So congratz, Sarah, you did a great job!! =)

I didn't get to take many pictures, because I was a bit busy running around the whole night, so ... =(

AND, AND, AND .... my feet are killing me. I really shouldn't have worn heels. *sniff* The things we do to make ourselves look taller (much needed in my case). *dramatic sigh*

I love you too much to let you go.

Friday, 22 August 2008

The Promise of Sweet Release.

... because HOI is finally OVER.

No more history of ideas essays ............................ EVER!!

No more Tiberius Gracchus, no more Carl Jung, NO MORE HOI!!!!

Although I don't think I did as well this time, compared to the first essay. BUT WHATEVER! What's done is done, no?

SO. I think everybody is like, celebrating the end of HOI. Carmen, Li Wern, Caryn (Carmen's cousin) and I went for dinner, and then watched this show called "Baby Mama". The movie was ... pretty okay, actually. Apart from some parts which were very ... cheesy. But it was quite good. =)

Oh, right, there were quite a few Trinity students in Melbourne Central, Siew Ling, Rena, Doreen, Wyn and a few others were there.. also saw Nicholas, Edgar, Resa and Alex earlier in the evening. Speaking of which ........ I WANT TO WATCH 'Taken' !!! Siew and all said it was really good. And the trailer looks really interesting. =)

Oh, oh, something Carmen said yesterday.. very amusing (as per usual). =)

Caitlin: Eh, what does psyche mean again?

Carmen: Erm, I dunno. Why are you asking me? Dunno la. *pause* Is it a cute word for psychology?

Caitlin: Ohmygoodness Carmen.. you're a disgrace to the education system.

Carmen: OMG I'm so funny! That was so funny! Don't you think? *laughs*

Yeah, my roomate makes my life interesting. =)

At the moment I am too lazy to put up pictures of everything so far, but I will soon.

TTFN for now! =)

I WILL school my heart into patience.

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

History of Ideas Mania.

... because I still haven't finished my essay.

There are approximately

40 hours

left to do the essay.





Today ... was not a good day. Well, it was a good day which turned into a not-so-good day which turned out to be pretty okay in the end. In Chemistry practical .......... hahaha. First, I forgot to take the initial reading for some titration thing we were doing. We only had enough standard solution to do 4 runs, so luckily the last 3 runs were like, PERFECT. =) But then ........... I spilled a drop of potassium permanganate on my hand. And it went brownish and wouldn't come off my hand. =( But it's gone now! =) And then ............ I nearly broke the measuring cyliner. =( But it didn't break! =) After that, I ... was quite blur with the calculations, etc. =( But I got it right in the end, and my results were amazing(ly correct)! =)


Ohmygoodness. (S)He REALLY PISSES ME OFF.

But I will NOT let myself be affected by it.


Oh, and thanks WeiKhai for listening to my crap, and thanks HouChuen for saying that I'm INDISPENSABLE to you. *grin*

Oh, oh, and because I'm in a good mood now, and the thought just popped into my mind, I shall say it now.


Hahaha. Don't look at me weirdly, Carmen, I have no idea why, it just popped into my head. You should be honoured. =) Hmmm, maybe it's because she's been making very unintentional and silly comments that betray her *ahem* oh-so-charming (being sarcastic here) personality. But whatever. She's fun to be around la. Or maybe it's because she's written less than me for the essay. Haha. That might just be it. XD

How did I fall in love with you, again?

Tuesday, 19 August 2008


... because sometimes that's how people see you, and there's nothing you or anyone else can or will do about it.

"Someone To Love"

by Shayne Ward

She came along
Broke the spell
And set me free
Push aside
What use to be
All the broken hearted man that once was me
I never gave it up
I always believe
When she's in my arms I know what I achieve

So hear me loneliness
I'm giving up on you
I don't need you anymore
I've found what I've been looking for
So hear me emptiness
I've got no room for you
I've finally found what I've been dreaming of
Someone to love

Cos I was lost
I was down and out
Until that day
I knew what my life was all about
Still wonder how
She came my way
She's the reason I'm smiling here today

So hear me loneliness
I'm giving up on you
I don't need you anymore
I've found what I've been looking for
So hear me emptiness
I've got no room for you
I've finally found what I've been dreaming of

Someone to love
To hold
To be my inspiration
Someone to touch, to cherish for life

So hear me loneliness
I'm giving up on you
I don't need you anymore
I've found what I've been looking for
So hear me emptiness
I've got no room for you
I've finally found what I've been dreaming of
Someone to love

Someone to love

Oh baby

So hear me emptiness
I've got no room for you
I've finally found what I've been dreaming of
I've finally found what I've been dreaming of
Someone to love
Someone to love

It's during times like this that I find myself thinking of you.

A girl likes to be crossed in love now and then, because it gives her something to think of.

Monday, 18 August 2008

Live Your Myth.

The Olympics will be the downfall of me.

Like, seriously. I need to unplug the TV socket or something. Every single time I sit down and *try* to do my essay, and I can't think of anything to write (which is 99% of the time), I switch on the TV. Now THAT CAN'T BE GOOD. Apart from the fact that I have a History of Ideas essay (worth 30%) and an Environment & Development essay (worth 20%) due, I also have an English for Academic purposes body paragraph to write, a drama script to write AND practice acting, three monologues to memorise, a Chemistry practical report to write, oh, and what else did I forget?

Yes, the Talent Quest.

And while I'm on that subject.. *sigh* No response la.... *sniff*

Okay, so a few people put the forms in. But there just isn't any hype about it. I know, I know, there's the essays and everything, all the same... most of the major essays will be due a bit more than a week before the Talent Quest (5th September). So technically.. there's still time to get a piece together, right? Okay, FINE, that's not much time. BUT STILL. It's for charity. I just want it to work. Please, please, please.

And since a lot of people have been asking - one of the confirmed prizes is a bag from Gucci that's worth.. $775, if I'm not very much mistaken. Yeah.

*crosses fingers* I just hope it works out.

Oh, and Carmen makes my life interesting. Seriously.

Today, after student committee meeting..

Wen Juin and Michele are insulting/complimenting each other like no one's business. (by the way, their level of insults have reached new levels, especially since both of them have an attention span of ... approximately 2 seconds)

Carmen: You know what, the two of you are like Paris and Nicole. Wen, you should be Nicole.

Michele: Oh, oh, because she's got a baby right??

Carmen: Huh?? Er.... I was going to say because she's short.

Wen Juin: Eh, excuse me, are you trying to say I'm fat??

Caitlin: HUH?? Nicole is damn thin la!

Wen Juin: No, she was FAT.

Caitlin & Carmen: That's because she was PREGNANT.

*a few minutes later*

Carmen: Omg, Michele, you and Wen should really start a reality show la. Like Paris and Hilton.

*cue for Michele & Caitlin to look at Carmen weirdly*

Caitlin: PARIS and HILTON, Carmen?

*Michele & Caitlin burst into laughter*

Carmen: Eh, eh, shit! Accident la!! Yer..... You guys suck la... Accident!!!!!!

*Caitlin & Michele continue laughing*

See how amusing my life is because of my friends? And these are just the things I have time to post up. =)

Riding on the high of that 15 minutes of fame.

Sunday, 17 August 2008




HOW CAN ????


HOW CAN LA ?????

But Malaysia is losing anyway. NEVERMIND, AT LEAST GOT SILVER MEDAL !!!



Okay, technically I should have finished that History of Ideas essay on Jung a few hours ago. Plan failed. MISERABLY.

OMG MALAYSIA LOST. 1st set 21-12 and 2nd set 21-8 to China (Lin Dan). Again, WHATEVER. Still got silver medal. Better than nothing.

I hate Jung. Jung is messing with my head. I'm going to fail History of Ideas. It's due on Friday. I have not written ANYTHING. I'm going to FAIL.

We had a good thing going.

Saturday, 16 August 2008

Dreaming With A Broken Heart.

The most amazing dance EVER. Okay, fine, I like it. It's so .... *gasp* The way they can never really reach each other, he falls on the bed, she jumps off.. Really amazing. =)

Anyway, I'm really busy with things, and I've got to finish TWO essays today. SO. I hope I'll be back on Monday. I've got pictures to post up and all. =)


I said I would stop, but all I see in my mind is you and me.

Wednesday, 13 August 2008


Went skating today. At Docklands. Oaktree charity event thing. =)

I asked Carmen and Jiah Lit to come.

Pictures. =)

Me. Carmen.

Jiah Lit. Me. Oh yeah, you know what? I like this guy. He insults Carmen. =)=)

Jiah Lit. Me. Carmen.

Yeaaaah. We're girls. What else can I say? =)

More anectodes. I swear, Carmen really knows how to make a fool of herself. Not on purpose, of course. *grin*

Carmen: Jiah Lit, you look so "excited".

Jiah Lit: Huh?

Carmen: Must be the company.


Carmen: Oh wait. That's an insult to me right.


Carmen: Caitlin, you look like a little kid. Like, 5 years old. Seriously.

Caitlin: OMG I so do not look that young. Jiah Lit, do I look that young?

Jiah Lit: No, not that young la.. Maybe five and a half.

Caitlin: *narrows eyes* Thanks a lot.

Carmen: Jiah Lit, you're like a girl.

*Jiah Lit looks scandalised*

Carmen: I mean, you're like a girl, but a guy version. I mean, you're nice to talk to.

*Jiah Lit still looks affronted*

Yeah. It was a fun day. =)

Ooooh, an opening. Now if I could just wriggle in ....... That would be a start. =)

Tuesday, 12 August 2008

Tell Me A Story.

I really, really, really, REALLY feel like reading story books.

Can't wait for Brisingr to come out!! September 20th.. ARGH.

Things to do, places to go, people to see..

ONLY TWO MORE ESSAYS TO GO! Excluding Literature. But that's not counted, we haven't gotten that yet.

Yay. I'm bored. I'm feeling restless. I want to watch the Olympics. I watched the women's synchronized 10m springboard diving event just now. Amazing, really, how they can be so .. TOGETHER. And make such a tiny tiny splash! So cool. The two girls from China were super good. So consistent.

I'm going skating tomorrow. =)

I'm still feeling restless.

Maybe it is because I find it hard to forgive the vices and follies of others. My good opinion once lost, is lost forever.

Monday, 11 August 2008


I think everybody has a soundtrack. They have a compilation of songs that either effectively describe who they are or are part of their list of favourite songs. So lets see, I'll try to compile one for myself. And I tag people! -JM-

My dear cousin decided to tag me. I shall comply this time. =)

1. The Way - Clay Aiken
It's in the way that you hold me, and the way that you know me.
The song of new hopes.

2. How Did I Fall In Love With You - Backstreet Boys
Remember when, we never needed each other, the best friends like, sister and brother, we understood, we'd never be, alone. Those days are gone, and I want you so much.
Now that really is the question.

3. Everything I Do, I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
Search your heart, search your soul, and when you find me there you'll search no more.
Try it sometime.

4. Sometimes when we touch - Dan Hill
I wanna hold you till I die, till we both break down and cry, I wanna hold you, till the fear in me subsides.
Just sometimes.

5. If You're Not The One - Daniel Bedingfield
We'll make it through and I hope you are the one I share my life with.
What if.

6. Together We Are One - Delta Goodrem
And now we've come so far, one chance to touch a star.
One chance.

7. Collide - Howie Day
I'm quiet you know, you make a first impression.
Something you said.

8. So Close - Jon McLaughlin
So close to reaching that famous happy end, almost believing this was not pretend.
So close, yet still so far.

9. The Call - Regina Spektor
It started out as a feeling, which then grew into a hope.
That's how it began.

10. Truly Madly Deeply - Savage Garden
I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy.

11. Fall For You - Secondhand Seranade
But hold your breath, because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you, over again.
Not again.

12. Amazing - Westlife
It's like I live a thousand lifetimes, still looking for the one that feels right.
A long, long, time.

13. What Makes A Man - Westlife
Tell me what makes a man, wanna give you all his heart.
What indeed.

14. Eternity - Robbie Williams
Close your eyes so you don't feel them, they don't need to see you cry. I can't promise I will heal you, but if you want to I will try.
A song for mending broken hearts.

15. It's All Coming Back To Me Now - Celine Dion
And I banished every memory you and I had ever made.
Of past mistakes long forgotten.

Tagging: Carmen & Shereen. =)

I don't want to live without you, but I will if I have to.