Saturday, 28 June 2008

Companionate Love.

Michele said something very amusing and *slightly* disturbing the other day. Ryan commented that Carmen and I, even though we've known each other for eight and a half years (half of Carmen's life, don't mess XD), don't go out together very often compared to two of our mutual friends (whom I will call friend X and friend Y) who only knew each other since coming here.

Okay, I'm going to give some background information now. Now you see, we learn this thing about passionate love and companionate love in Psychology. Passionate love is the whole thing where people are so-in-love and passionate about each other and .. you get the gist. Companionate love, however, is love that has endured the test of time, and you are comfortable and intimate with your partner (as in, like, sharing your deepest, darkest secrets, etc.) and you're receiving from the relationship what you're giving. Yes. So those are more or less the meanings of passionate and companionate love.

Now, after Ryan made that observation, Michele totally said:

"You know why? I think it's because right, Carmen and Caitlin have known each other for so long already, so they're experiencing the friendship version of companionate love".

*cue for Caitlin and Ryan to look at Michele weirdly*

Michele, "What? True what! They are like, comfortable and secure in their relationship with each other already, they don't feel the need to go out together because their relationship is already established! There, like friend X and friend Y, they only knew each other since coming here, so they feel the need to establish their relationship, so they're in the friendship version of passionate love, so they go out together a lot!"

Caitlin, "Okay, Michele, that's a BIIIIIIIIIIIT disturbing. You know. Just A BIT."

Ryan, "Exactly. Just a biiiiit disturbing."

Michele, "What?? Don't you feel? I feel it's like that lor!"

Yes. Disturbing conversation, no? Anyway, Carmen knows I love her, don't you, Carmen? And vice versa, of course. She loves me too! *grin*


Carmen: Eh Caitlin, next time right, if you ever cook eggs for me again, use the round container, don't use the square one.

Caitlin: Er, okay. Why?

Carmen: Because the square one is bloody hard to wash.

Caitlin: Okay, I'll make sure I use the SQUARE one then! =)

Carmen: Oh haha thank you, very funny. 

Caitlin: Sure, no problem! *beam*

Carmen: Eh, try not to miss me too much okay!!

Caitlin: You so wish, Carmen.

Carmen: It's okay, Caitlin, it's okay.. You can admit it..

Caitlin: Yes, I'm going to miss you. *cough*splutter*snigger*snort*cough*

See how much we love each other? XD

ANYWAY. I'm going home. =) By this time tomorrow, I'll be in Tullamarine Airport. Hehe.

I keep telling myself that it makes no sense. But even if it doesn't, even if I'm deluding myself, I just can't stop loving you.

Happy happy=)



I'm happy happy. =)

I'm happy with my Psychology paper.

And my Chemistry paper (to a much lesser extent).

And my Environment & Development paper.

And my Mathematics paper.

That's like, everything. Hahahahahaha. I'm so super high right now. =)

Have I ever mentioned how much I love Psychology? And everything else? *grin*


I didn't have time to post this up yesterday, so ..


Currently I'm too lazy to post up all the pictures, so YES, I hope you liked the surprises and the cake and the .. everything else lah! =) Oh wait, I forgot. You totally said you loved me and everything right. *grin*

I'm going home on SUNDAY!!

I'm going HOME!!!

Back to MALAYSIA!!!

Back to KL!!!

Hahahahahaha. Happy happy. =)


Okay. For Environment and Development, there was this question "Education is the best contraceptive. Explain".

So the answer to this question is obviously how educated women know the risks and make sure they protect them self, etc.. so I was totally bored with my answer, so I wanted to try prove that statement mathematically! But I didn't have time during the exam, so I did it after, and this is what I got!

Prove that Education = Contraceptive.

Equation 1 ... Education = Contraceptive
Equation 2 ... No Education = No Contraceptive

Equation 1 + Equation 2 ... 

Education + No Education = Contraceptive + No Contraceptive
Education (1 + No) = Contraceptive (1 + No)
Education (1 + No) = Contraceptive (1 + No)

Therefore ... Education = Contraceptive [proven]

Okay, okay, yes, I know it's stupid, and it's not very cool, because the "beginning equation" is the same as the "final equation". But WHATEVER okay? Hehe.

I'm sleepy. I've got a lot of things to do. Like, pack. And get movies from people and stuff. =) And .. get fruits to bring back home. And .. come up with a speech for my grandmother's surprise 80th birthday dinner. Which I will have to deliver in Mandarin. I can't even think of what to say in English. Crap.


Monday, 23 June 2008

Yay !!


It's like, the end of exams man !!

Okay, technically it's not. I've still got THREE more papers, unlike SOME PEOPLE who only have TWO papers left. But that's okay, it's my fault I took an extra subject. *beam*

I'm HAPPY !!!!!!!


Have I mentioned how much I love Maths? *double beam*

Okay, maybe I didn't do so well. But I hope I did. But whatever, I still felt better about it than the term 1 Maths, so THAT'S GOOD. =)



Now all I have left is :-

Tuesday - Environment and Development

Thursday - Chemistry

Friday - Psychology

And then, on Sunday ..........

*jeng jeng jeng*


Going to Pangkor Laut (for like, 3 days) after reaching the airport, holidaying with relatives and all. =)


Happy happy happy. =)

A deep, meaningful relationship takes time and effort, you hypocrite.

Friday, 20 June 2008

Heh. =P

Okay, okay. Just a short post. Promise. =)

Went with a bunch of people to surprise Alastair last night. Since he stays in College Square Lygon, and most of us stay in College Square Swanston, I think Eric, Ethel, Stephanie and the people who planned this thing planned it to be in College Square on Swanston.

To cut a long story short, Alastair was in Joleen's room. And to make sure that Alastair was kept there until 11.55 p.m., Eric told Joleen, "You had better keep him there until midnight, even if you have to rape him. If not I will rape you."


And when she (Joleen) opened the door for us, we were expecting to see Alastair sitting in the lounge or something, but she pointed to the BEDROOM. *smirk* They burst into the bedroom with the cake, only to find Alastair comfortably lying down on JOLEEN'S BED. *double smirk*

Anyway, he was pretty surprised and yadda, yadda, yadda.. and when he came out of the room, he said, "Wow, it's quite late already, so many of you all here...".

And that's not the funny bit.


"Hmmmm, you also know, hor, Alastair, what are you doing HERE, hmmm?" (obviously referring to the fact that he was in Joleen's room and everything *triple smirk*)

And he (Alastair) gave a totally sheepish grin. =)


They stuffed his face into the cake TWICE. Well, nobody could move his head (must be due to the extremely large ego, but that's besides the point XD), so Ethel was smart, and she totally smashed the cake on his face. It was HILARIOUS.

Do you see any resemblance to Robin? The one from Batman? =P

The smashed cake. TAKE #1.


The smashed cake. TAKE #2.

So funny la. =)

Will put up the group picture once I have time.

And the (Psychology) busking pictures!

OMG our busking was GOOD. We totally earned, like,


I am SERIOUS. We totally broke the record man. =)

And the money goes to Burma, so that's good.

Pictures (and hopefully video) will be up after exams. ;)

English for Academic Purposes exam tomorrow. Wish me luck!

It all comes down to what we think is best for ourselves.

Wednesday, 18 June 2008

Blogging Hiatus.

As the title suggests .....

I am going on a self-declared BLOGGING HIATUS.

So responsible hor?

A lot of stuff to study. =(

Exams are next week.


Byebye blog.


Soon. Probably sooner than expected, but let's just pretend that my blogging hiatus will last till after the exams end. =)

Oh, and BY THE WAY.

Happy (early) birthday to Alastair Kwan (19th June). ;)

All we want is to love someone and be loved in return.

Monday, 16 June 2008


Surprise, surprise.

It didn't work.

I didn't chain myself to the desk, and I didn't finish my Literature essay.

I did HALF of the essay. It took me FIVE HOURS to do HALF of the essay.

Now I've got a quarter of the essay left to do.

Carmen's dad brought us out for lunch and dinner yesterday. I haven't eaten in a restaurant in a looooooooong time. Thank you Uncle!! =)

I'm behind on studying.

Like, VERY behind.

Like, won't finish on time, behind.

I think.

At least I've started studying.

At least I know what I don't know.

But that's not good enough.

I'm off to study Psychology. =)

Desperado much?

Saturday, 14 June 2008


I can't believe I spent three hours watching this show today.

I was supposed to study!!!

Tomorrow, I am seriously going to CHAIN MYSELF TO THE DESK if I have to, and start STUDYING and finishing my Literature essay.

Apart from the fact that I totally forgot planned to do my work tomorrow, Titanic was ...................................... sad. I haven't watched it in ages.


Now all I need to do is find my "Jack".

That would be ideal, wouldn't it?

I'm off to bed.

Chaining myself to the desk tomorrow. ;)

What makes a man.

Friday, 13 June 2008


Finally, THE WEEKEND !!!!

This week has been ................... TIRING.

I woke up early this morning to see my Maths tutor during one of my two free periods. I desperately need help for Maths. And everything else. But that's besides the point. Anyway, the point is, I woke up 2 hours earlier than I had to for EXTRA MATHS CLASS with my tutor. And I ASKED for it. Me. Asking for like, extra class. Think of it as tuition.

But it helps.

I think.

I hope.

It had better help.

I've got no Chemistry practical next Wednesday, so I'm going to spend those three and a half hours doing Maths with my tutor. *sigh* Oh well. It's for my own good, right? *gloom*

On the bright side, Psychology is soooooo fun. For the last two tutorials, we've been practicing SINGING. Seriously. What for?


It's a Psychology experiment, actually. We go out and supposedly "busk" and see if people give us money. Of course, we return the money, since it's just an experiment. The idea is to find out the reasons people give us money, whether it's because they think we're good (however unlikely), or whether they think it's for a good cause.. etc. According to Ian (Psychology tutor), our class is pretty good, and we'll "blow them away". But I have absolutely no idea how far the truth stretches. =P

Oh, my Literature tutor said that I'm off to a good start with my Literature essay (which is like, REALLY good because I was totally crapping), so well, that's good. Now all I need to do is get off to a good ending. =.= She wants like, 1800 words, not 1500 words. Dieeeeeeeeee...

Extra Psychology lecture tomorrow (Saturday, 9 a.m., Buzzard Lecture Theatre), to replace the one we missed on the public holiday, so I can't go for the extra Chemistry class, which, unfortunately, is the last one before the exams which start the following week. Craaaaaaaaaap.

Because every time we touch, I swear I can fly.

Wednesday, 11 June 2008

Literature essay.

I can't think of anything to write for my literature essay. Maybe it would help if I tried harder, but somehow I just can't seem to focus on it. It's like ... my brain just doesn't want to write the essay. Gahhhh.. I need to get it finished by this Friday afternoon. For a few reasons. One is so that my Literature tutor can go over it and I can correct it if I have to. Another is so that I can get started (studying) for other subjects. Like Maths. And Psychology. And Chemistry.

This is the question I'm doing for the Literature essay. "The ability to imagine that we are someone other than who we are is the core of our humanity, and the beginning of our morality" (Ian McEwan). Discuss in relation to Fahrenheit 451.

Anyone care to help? =)

At the rate I'm going, I'm never going to get the essay done. *sigh*

At least I'm done with my Environment and Development essay. 1021 words.. But it was more fun to write than this Literature essay will be. I miss creative writing. You know, writing stories and all that. Academic writing is no fun. =( Even the E & D essay had to be based on real facts. It's like doing Bahasa Malaysia karangan in English. *double sigh* At least it's in English, not Malay.

I can't wait for the exams to be over.. I just want a good night's sleep.

Can't stand up for falling down.

Tuesday, 10 June 2008


Michele came over to "study" just now. And we all know what that means, don't we? (for those who don't know- it means that studying just doesn't happen). *grin*

She got through 2 pages of Psychology, which is, for her.... hehehe. Okay, okay. The funny part was when she went over to Carmen's computer and started (supposedly) doing Carmen's Literature essay.

(stolen from Carmen's blog)

In Fahrenheit 451, there is a damn hot guy by the name of Peter. You see, Peter was all alone, living the life of killing evil people (ie. Prince Caspian) in Narnia; mana tahu deep inside he longed for more. He longed for a love so strong it overpowered his clarity. He finally found it in HER. Michele. The One. Who is this Michele, you ask? She is this awesome specimen of greatness which Peter found intriguing. He tried so hard to get her attention, but failed to do so, for she was playing hard to get, and he tried and tried again because he just couldn’t give up. He knew, deep inside, no matter how hard he tried to forget her, he KNEW, she was the one. The one who could fill every hole in his heart, every missing piece in his soul. They were destined to beeeeeee…

Michele has reached new levels of delusion. Seriously. =P

Value the person who cherishes the friendship more than the person who pursues a relationship. If you have a friendship before a relationship, and if the relationship ends, you still have the friendship. If you have a relationship without the friendship, when the relationship ends, you have nothing in common anymore. Know what it means to be a friend first. That is the key to a lasting relationship. Not having anything in common, other than a mutual desire - that is why it was doomed to fail from the start. When you make the mistake once, you don't let it happen again. Because the pain you feel after it's all over, it just isn't worth it.

-Caitlin Kang-

This is what is ideal.

Monday, 9 June 2008

The Call.

I LOVE this song.

The Call - by Regina Spektor

It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder
'Til it was a battle cry

I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye

Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never
Been this way before

All you can do is try to know
Who your friends are
As you head off to the war

Pick a star on the dark horizon
And follow the light

You'll come back
When it's over
No need to say good bye

Now we're back to the beginning
It's just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can't feel it too
Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
'Til they're before your eyes

You'll come back
When it's over
No need to say good bye

It was played at the end of the movie Prince Caspian (The Chronicles of Narnia). Sooooooooooo romantic okay!! Haha.

Anyway, I was googling the lyrics, and I found it in this guy's blog. He's so considerate, you know what he put in that entry?

The Call by Regina Spektor - for those who found this entry through googling the lyrics.

Haha. Nice guy.

Right. I'm sooooooooo behind in my work and everything. I switched on the computer to do my Environment & Development essay, but ended up getting sidetracked, watching House and searching for that song. =)

Heh. Okay, back to my essay. I hope I don't get distracted again. But I probably will. Rats.

Sometimes matches made in heaven don't work on earth.

Sunday, 8 June 2008

Of Getting Lost and Not Knowing Where To Go.

I went to the rink today.

Left the apartment at noon.

Took a tram to Melbourne Central, the took the Pakenham line to Oakleigh. So far so good.

Reached Oakleigh after a bit more than 30 minutes. Did not know where to go. Followed crowd of people who seemed to know where they were going.

Saw bus signs. Checked instructions on how to get there (Take Route 733 to Box Hill and tell bus driver to stop at the bus stop in front of Centre Rd, Olympic Ice Rink). Spent 10 minutes wondering which side of the road bus was supposed to be on.

Found out that I was supposed to cross the road.

Crossed road.

Time was approximately 1.20 p.m. Checked bus schedule. Next bus at 1.50 p.m. Too late. Ice-skating session starts at 2 p.m.

Decided to take taxi. Taxi driver did not know where Olympic Ice Rink was. Told taxi driver to drop me at 1081 Centre Rd, South Oakleigh. Address of Olympic Ice Rink is 1080 Centre Rd, South Oakleigh.

Could not find 1080. Found everything BUT 1080.


Sent message to Da Wei, Cherish and Jiah Lit. Jiah Lit called, asked me where I was. Tried explaining, he still had no idea where I was. Told him that I could only find 1079 and 1081, but not 1080. Told me to look for the even numbers. Ergo: GO TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE ROAD.

Went to opposite side of road. Did not know whether to walk upwards or downwards. Walked downwards first, just in case. Address: 978.

Walked all the way back up.


Might as well have waited for the bus. Was late anyway. Reached rink at 2.08 p.m.

Only one good thing came out of the whole losing-my-way thing. I'll NEVER lose my way to the rink, ever again. Will commit the bus schedule to memory and not waste time waiting for bus ever again.

The rink is best described as LONG. Olympic length, definitely. Olympic width.. I don't think so.

Anyway. I'm happy. I can still do all my jumps (double toe-loop and double loop not counted, I never really got those jumps right in the first place), and all my spins. So it's all good. =) Surprisingly, my flying camel spin and flying sit spin are better than what it used to be. And that's saying something, since I haven't skated in MONTHS. I think it's the quality of the ice. It must be. =)

THANK YOU to Jiah Lit and Cherish for helping me with the directions and everything. =)

Doomed to fail from the start.

Prince Caspian. ;)

The movie was good. They changed some parts of the book, but made it a little bit more exciting. So yeah, it was pretty good. Prince Caspian, people. =)

Only Michele is hung up on King Peter.

It's amusing.

We walked all the way back from Melbourne Central to College Square discussing King Peter and Prince Caspian. And Rain. But it was more or less a monologue (hint: Tan Shereen). =P Kidding, kidding. Fun night. =)

Joleen. Shereen. Me. Michele. - we weren't ready. Ryan is lousy photographer. =P

Me. Moon Yee.

Kissy face. Moon Yee and Ryan. =)

Carmen. Joleen. Shereen. Me. Michele. Moon Yee.

Me. Michele.

Shereen. Me. Michele. Moon Yee.

Me. Ryan.

Finally - Shereen and her Speed Racer/Rain. =)

Are you thoughtful and kind? Do you care what's on my mind?

Saturday, 7 June 2008


Today's Itinerary:

Chemistry class.
Queen Victoria market.
Touch rugby.

I cut my running time today!! 2 weeks ago it was around 20 minutes, today I cut it down to 16.31 !! So yay !!! And apparently Princes Park is not 3.2 k.m., as I originally thought it was, it's 3.6 k.m., so that's even better, because that means I haven't deteriorated all that much. =) Okay, fine, I'm still a few minutes slower than I used to be, but I'm working on it. It's hard to cut down a few minutes, though. =(

Touch rugby today was .............................. wet. It was absolutely disgusting, my shoes and socks are totally SOAKED. But it was pretty fun. There's so much difference between the first time we played and now. And there are good and bad things about it. The good thing, obviously, is that everyone's getting much better at the game. The bad thing is, unfortunately, that sometimes people take the game too seriously. While it's good that the standard is improving, it somehow just doesn't seem to be as fun as it used to be. Oh well. Figures.

We're watching Prince Caspian tonight. From the Chronicles of Narnia. I like that book. Hope the movie won't be a disappointment. I thought the first Narnia movie they made was pretty good. At least it didn't change too much of the book.

I haven't been studying much. That's not a good thing. Like, REALLY not good. Need to get up to speed on Maths, especially. Psychology, Environment and Development, Chemistry.. Gah.

I don't believe it, you were right. All he needed was closure.

Thursday, 5 June 2008



I've made up my mind.


I miss the ice. =)

Now all that remains ........... is to make sure I don't get lost on the way there. =P

I shan't count today, because today's almost ended.. So only TWO DAYS LEFT till I get to skate again!! Can't waittttttttttttttttttttttt...

Ice skating rink, here I comeeeeeeee !!!!!! =)

I'm happy!!

Ice makes me happy. *sigh*


Don't give me hope if there's nothing to hope for.

Wednesday, 4 June 2008

So not emo. =)

Exams in two weeks!


Subjects to study for :-

Chemistry. More or less the whole form 4 & 5 syllabus, plus a lot of extra information they never taught us in high school. Like, enough to fit in that ridiculously thick SPM revision book, a lot.
Mathematics. Same case as Chemistry. All the old stuff and a whole lot of new stuff to boot.
Psychology. A lesser (and definitely more fun) version of Biology. 8 chapters. Still have to memorise a load of names and important experiments.
Environment & Development. No idea what to study for this. Two exams. One open book essay. Another written exam.
English for Academic Purposes. All the bibliography and referencing crap. Crap.

Hmmm. Doesn't look like so much when I write it all down like that. Maybe because those are just the exams. Now, add in the assignments..

29th May - Hand in Environment and Development End Child Slavery Campaign report.
30th May - Hand in 1200 words History of Ideas essay.
12th June - Hand in 1000 words Environment and Development creative essay.
23rd June - Hand in 1500 words Literature essay.

Add in the time we need to do research to actually DO the essays..

And the time we need to use to finish doing all those maths tutorial worksheets they give every week..

And the time we need to do laundry, cook, and everything else..

And hey presto!

No time to study.

Not good. Really not good.

Actually there is time. Really, there is. It's just a bit, you know. Tiring. But it's okay. I can cope.

I was supposed to wake up at 8.30 a.m. today (Chemistry practical is once a fortnight, so yay.) and cook, then do some Maths work. I woke up at 9.30 a.m., cooked, washed up all the stuff, took a bath, and didn't have time to do Maths because I had class at 1.45 p.m.

It's funny.. one of my friends today was saying that she found it difficult to cope. I was surprised, because she's taking the normal three electives. Maybe it's because she didn't take Add Maths in high school, so she's finding the Maths a bit difficult. And apparently the Economics and Accounts they teach here is different from what they learnt in Malaysia. But then, even though I did take Add Maths, it's not like I was ever any good at it. But I guess I still absorbed SOME things. At least. I can't say anything about Accounts and Economics, because I didn't take those in high school, and I'm certainly not taking them now. But could it be more difficult than Chemistry? I mean, I'm not saying Chemistry is more difficult. I think it's about the same difficulty. Just like there are bits in Chemistry that are hard to understand, I'm sure there are bits in Economics and Accounts that are hard to understand. But you know what? People DO get through it. Wherever you go, whether it's in Malaysia or whether it's here in Australia, you still have to do it. Nobody ever said life was easy. If it was, then everybody could do it. And if everybody could do it, then well.. you'd just have to reach higher, and it's bound to get difficult when you reach a certain stage. So why back out? Why not just keep trying? Why give up before you try?

During subject selection (months ago), I was dead set on taking an extra elective. I figured, why not, you know? No harm having some extra knowledge. I figured it wasn't a waste of time, because well, if knowledge is a waste of time, then everything else is as well. So when it was my turn, I sat down and I told the teacher (I didn't know who it was at that time, but later I found out-it was Felicity.) that I wanted to take 4 electives, instead of the usual 3. She looked at my forecast results on the sheet of paper and she looked up at me and said "If I saw straight A1s all the way down, I'd say go ahead, take four electives, you can handle it". I didn't have straight A1s. There were a smattering of As, a couple of Bs and a few Cs. Not good enough for her. She told me straight off that I wouldn't be able to cope, that I would be stretching myself too thin. She told me I would need all the time I could get to do well for even three electives. She said to me, "I PROMISE you that you are going to drop the extra subject by the end of the first term, because you will find it too much to cope with". Well, Felicity, it's almost the end of term 2, and I haven't dropped it yet. And I don't feel all that unable to cope. I didn't have to give up much. All I had to do was not spend so much time lazing around, not spend too much time on the computer. I still have time to blog, I still have time to be part of the student committee, I still have time to be part of the Oaktree foundation, I still have time for exercise, I still have time to study, I still have time to finish all my assignments, I still have time to cook, do laundry, and I still find time to get at least 8 hours of sleep every night, and I wake up at 7 a.m. on almost all weekdays. AND I still HAVE FUN. I am coping, and this is proof for you. I know it's only the end of term 2, and it hasn't gotten all that hard yet. But you know what? I've survived this long, and I'm NOT GIVING UP. Felicity, you told me that a lot of people start the year with four subjects, but about 1 in every few hundred students end the year with four subjects.. and I'm going to do everything I can to be that 1 in a few hundred. You promised me I would drop the subject by the end of term 1.. but you were wrong. I've proved you wrong. And I'll do it again.

Oooh. Totally got caught up in that whole subject selection thing. Sorry. I was REALLY pissed off at her for talking to me like that. Saying that I was incapable and all. Ugh, it just gets me so worked up. How can she say that?? Grrr..

Okay, I'm calm.

Heh. =P

Now I've got to get back to my E & D essay. Toodles.


You're just jealous.

Tuesday, 3 June 2008

What if? Confusion. Torment. Reflection.

You know you have to make a decision sooner or later.

You can't keep waiting your whole life.

But what if ... what if.

What if you KNOW that there's something better out there.

But you're not sure if you can get it. Maybe in the near future. Maybe wait just a few more years.

And what if there's something NOW. Something you can get that's perfectly good in every way, but not the something you wanted.

What do you do?

Do you let it slip by, waiting, hoping for the something you wanted?

Or do you take the chance, take a leap of faith, and go with the something that's perfectly good, but not the one you wanted? And forever wonder what could have, what would have happened, if you had just waited that few years.

What if you decide to wait? And you end up without BOTH the something you wanted AND without the something that was perfectly good but didn't want.

What if ...

What if ...

What if there was something better?

What if you let something perfectly good slip away?

What if you regret not waiting?

What if you waited for nothing?

I dreamt of you. But I guess that's as far as the reality of it goes. Because I don't think you remember me.

Monday, 2 June 2008

I See the Light Sorrounding You

Light Surrounding You
by Evermore

I see you by the water
Your toes dipped in the sand
I thought that it was over
I thought you'd understand
But the feeling is returning
Though time has made us change
And I understand if you don't
Wanna talk to me about it
Oh, tonight

Cos I see the light surrounding you
So don't be afraid of something new

Time was overtaking me
And I guess I was confused
They were all inviting me
But I wish I had refused
Cos I'd been there before
And I've seen it all
And I believe in you

And if you never had my heart
I would've never called you back
At the start that night
So I want you to know

That I see the light surrounding you
So don't be afraid of something new
Cos I see the light surrounding you
So don't be afraid of what you're turning into

Blue-eyed sun shines on me
In the morning
Can't help but feel a little cold
Thinking of you

Cos I see the light surrounding you
So don't be afraid of something new
Cos I see the light surrounding you
So don't be afraid of what you're turning into
No, don't be afraid
Don't be afraid
Cos I see the light
Cos I see the light
Cos I see the light surrounding you

You taught me how to be strong again. But sometimes I wonder if you still remember me.

Drama Exam.


I'm proud to say that I didn't mess up any of my lines. Word perfect. =)

I hope I conveyed all the emotions and stuff right.

We're not getting our marks until the following Monday. Everyone else is going to get their marks next week. Why? Next Monday is a public holiday. Queen's birthday. Not the current queen, one of the older Queens. It's not even a holiday in England. Or, that's what my English for Academic Purposes tutor told us anyway. He's from England, so I'm inclined to believe him. Australia still recognises the Queen of England as the head of the country, by the way. But of all days, why does it have to be NEXT MONDAY?? Grrr.. First class to do drama exam, last to get results. =(

Oh, did I mention that I'm virtually the first person in Trinity to do the drama exam? So cool right? Michele and Ryan agree. =) I say virtually because of course, there are other drama classes (one or two) that are running at the same time as mine. Drama exams run the whole of this week (June 2 - June 7), and my drama class is at 9.00 a.m. on Monday, so it's the first class of the day. And I was the first up (thanks to Roger, my drama teacher), so, yes. I still think it's cool, no matter what Carmen thinks. =)

All prepared for the monologue.

All black - emo-sial. Whaaaaaat? It was a graveyard scene. Quite cool hor? =P

Emo wey.. Hee. =)

It's not so much in the things we say, it's the things we do that make all the difference.

Sunday, 1 June 2008


I'm traumatized. In more ways than one.

Today was tree planting day.

It was at Trin-Warren Tamboore.

It's okay if you don't know where it is.

I didn't know either.

And I tried to walk there.

Well, I DID walk there.

It only took me about an hour and a half.

Have I ever told anybody how much I love my iPhone? It totally saved me, because of the satellite map or whatever it's called. The map they provided on the tree-planting brochure was more or less useless.

Jun and I were the only two people who weren't part of the group of about 20 Environment and Development students who were supposed to be there because that was their assignment.
So semangat, right?

Tree planting was... okay.

I should correct that. We didn't actually plant trees, we planted some kind of Australian indigenous plant. Which was grass. I'm sure the grass has a special name. I didn't bother finding out. So let's just call it grass.

Planting wasn't difficult. All we had to do was dig a hole big enough for the bunch of grass to fit in, and fill the hole back up with soil, then water it and wish it good luck. Seriously. We were supposed to wish the plants good luck after we planted them. I conveniently forgot to after planting my 5th one or so. Oh well. I hope they don't die. For good measure, I'll say it now. Good luck, plants! May you grow strong and healthy and have lots of babies!!

We headed back around 3.30 p.m. Ivan, Jun and I decided to take the train instead of walk all the way back. (Ivan and Jun walked there too-they took 1 hour and 45 minutes).

Now comes the traumatizing part. I didn't bring my wallet out. I had a tram ticket in my wallet. I didn't think I'd need it. I had money in my wallet. I didn't think I'd need it. I was going to plant trees, for heaven's sake! The trees weren't about to collect tax from me or anything. We walked to the train station. Ivan said he'd lend me money first, so I could buy a ticket. The train came. There was no time to buy a ticket. Jun didn't have time to validate her ticket. We jumped on the train. We were going to get off the train at Melbourne Central.

One stop before Melbourne Central, there was suddenly this voice that I swear, popped out of nowhere. Okay, fine, not nowhere, I just didn't notice the person until that said person talked. "Passengers, please get ready your tickets for inspection". Jun and I looked at each other. "Shit". We looked up and saw this lady wearing a clipping an official-looking badge to her white shirt.

To cut a long story short, she let us go. Thank goodness. Ivan managed to validate his ticket. So did Jae (another guy at the tree planting who joined us on the train). Jun and I were so totally panicking and everything. We wondered why they let us go. We heard they were really strict with this stuff. Which they are. They told us to immediately buy a ticket and validate it once we got off the tram. Which we did.

Scary. Ivan and Jae were laughing at my expression.


It was scary.

Do you know how much the fine is?

For not having a ticket with you?

$ 162.

That's ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO AUSTRALIAN DOLLARS. Convert that to Malaysian Ringgit? Multiply that by 3.08927.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to scare you.

I'm sure you can understand why I freaked out.

Ivan bought a $3.50 ticket for me once we got out, seeing as I didn't have my wallet with me. I'm going to pay him back when I see him in class on Tuesday. For the first time since coming here, I won't complain how expensive the tram tickets are.

Very traumatizing experience.


I've got drama (monologue) exam tomorrow morning. At 9.00 a.m.

I'm the first up.

Wish me luck.

We all try the best we can.