I was just reading a couple of emails I wrote a while back. In .. mid 2007. Wow, it seems like it was so long ago. And yet, it's only been well, less than two years. It feels like it was from a different lifetime.
What changed?
What changed to make things then so different from things now? Changes I never even noticed.
Nobody could be more shocked than I was, reading the things I wrote then. I can scarcely believe it ...
Where was the line between how I thought THEN, and how I think NOW? Where was the boundary, when was the crossing over, how did it happen? Why did I not realise?
Was it so gradual a change, that I did not notice? And it seems so drastic now.
I wonder, I really, really wonder.
When did I cross that line, and come to this new understanding?
And after that.. is THIS better, or was it better THEN?
I can't believe I sent that, I really can't. But there it is, cold, hard proof. What on Earth provoked me to do such a thing? Was I angry? Hurt? Sad? Did I resent it? Did I feel like it was happening all over again?
Where was the line??
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